


a little and a lot

by twinOrigins



Series: I'm holding my breath for you [2]
Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, Get Together, M/M, Marijuana, Shotgunning, Smoking, Starring Rich as Comedy Relief
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-03
Updated: 2017-12-03
Packaged: 2019-02-09 21:20:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12897057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twinOrigins/pseuds/twinOrigins
Summary: He didn't think he'd ever been this close to Michael before. He could see every little detail of his face. He felt caught in his eyes. They were so warm, flecks of light making them shimmer as he stared at him like Michael had all the time in the world and wanted to spend it with Jeremy.





	a little and a lot

**Author's Note:**

> Yay, I finally wrote a second part! Go me. This feels kind of awkward to me but hopefully it's just my overthinking. I miiight add another part to this eventually, & I've got a christmassy boyf riends fic planned for later this month so be on the lookout <3

It's the first time Michael and Jeremy have hung out since Jeremy's... ~~crisis~~ _revelation_ , and he has absolutely no idea what to do with himself. They're not even doing anything weird, Michael is just getting all of his smoking paraphernalia ready while Jeremy lounges on the couch, but Jeremy is a little in love and a lot terrified and he knows if he's ever going to say something, it _has_  to be today.

He's texting Rich about it all, a live feed of his anxiety because apparently _that's what he does now_ , and really when did this become his life. What is he doing.

_How do I SAY something like this_

_What the fuck Rich_

_He's getting ready to smoke maybe it'll be better when he's high_

_Being high calms you down right_

**_All that time around Michael n u never tried it ?? Tf_ **

_I tried_

_And coughed miserably while Michael laughed his ass off_

_And never tried again_

**_WAIT BRO BRO BRO THIS IS PERFECT_ **

_How_

**_SHOTGUN_ **

**_ASK HIM TO SHOTGUN_ **

**_U'll be fucking two seconds later if he has any idea how to do it right_ **

**_It's really hot_ **

_I don't what that means **Richard**_

**_It's where he blows the smoke in ur mouth_ **

**_Like[this](https://media.giphy.com/media/rdbRBVLJ4NSIE/giphy.gif)_ **

**_But gayer_ **

**_Bi-er ??_ **

_I CANT DO THAT_

He looked up. Michael was just about to light his--whatever it was. There were way too many words to describe weed-related things. Jeremy was lost. The SQUIP had helped a little with knowing what's what, but he didn't care enough to retain much.

**U can and u will**

Fuck you

**We've been over this Jer I know I'm sexy but u can't have me**

He rolls his eyes, turning his phone off for good. When he looks over to Michael he almost swallows his tongue. He's sprawled back, eyes closed as he takes a puff and Jeremy's brain is beating him over the head with the strong desire to climb on top of him.

He cleared his throat. "Hey, Michael. Have you ever shotgunned before?"

His eyes flicked open, meeting Jeremy's. He laughed a little. "Nah, who would I have to do that with?"

Jeremy looked away, staring studiously at a speck on the back of the couch. "We could try it. If you want."

He didn't seem convinced. "Really? You know what it is, right?"

"Yeah. I mean, I didn't at first. Rich told me. But I'd like to try it." He'd begun idly scraping at the speck with the back of his nail.

"If you're sure if won't be...weird for you." He still sounded hesitant.

"Maybe this way I won't start hacking as much. How...how does this work?"

Michael moved to sit beside him, both of them scooching so they were face to face. He leaned closer. Jeremy was breathing so shallowly he was almost holding his breath.

He didn't think he'd ever been this close to Michael before. He could see every little detail of his face. He felt caught in his eyes. They were so warm, flecks of light making them shimmer as he stared at him like Michael had all the time in the world and wanted to spend it with Jeremy.

Michael took a hit, holding it as he slowly took Jeremy's jaw in his hand and brought his lips close. Jeremy's mouth opened slightly. He was sure his hands would be shaking if they weren't clinging to the hem of his shirt. Michael breathed out the smoke, stroking his thumb on Jeremy's cheek as he breathed it in.

He felt lightheaded, and he knew it wasn't from the smoke.

"Okay?" Michael murmured, not leaning back yet.

"Yeah." He didn't raise his voice, this felt like a _moment_  and somehow he knew speaking normally would shatter it.

"Want another?" He still hadn't moved his hand.

Jeremy nodded just enough to get the point across.

This time, he watched Michael's lips. He's a little transfixed and a lot desirous. He wants to kiss Michael. Wants to kiss his _stupidly pretty_  lips, wait for him to open up and lick his way inside until they're making out and he finally has an excuse to climb on Michael's lap and have him grab his ass, he wants--

And he's blowing smoke gently into Jeremy's mouth again, only this time his lip lightly grazes Jeremy's and that's _it_ , he's done with worrying about what could go wrong. What about what could go right?

He releases his shirt, instead choosing to put his hand on the back of Michael's neck and tug him the short distance forward, and God this is all he wanted and more. Michael's kissing him back, _he's kissing Michael_.

He threads his fingers through the wavy hair at the base of his neck, just grounding himself. Michael tastes like smoke and soda and it's so _Michael_ that he ends up smiling so much it ruins the kiss.

They lean back enough to make eye contact, but don't pull apart. Michael's teeth are tugging at his bottom lip, a fruitless effort to quell his giant grin.

"Is this--a thing?"

Because it's _them_ , Jeremy doesn't have to ask what he means. "Yeah. Yeah, I think it should be. I've been a mess over you, lately. You--you've wanted this a while, haven't you?" He doesn't like talking about feelings, much, but it's long overdue at this point.

He huffs out, the air making his hair shift. It's more adorable than it has any right to be. "Yeah. A while." He doesn't say any more.

"I had no idea. I guess that's obvious. I got into this deal because I realized I--I kind of love you--" He's proud that his voice only wavers _slightly_  there. "I didn't know what to do. I talked to  _Rich_ about it. I was going to talk to you first before--I didn't mean to just kiss you like that, but. Well."

Michael laughs, a little breathless and a lot joyful. "I talked to Christine! I've been so gone on you, man. She's been a good friend."

Jeremy looks a bit floored. "We could have been going out this whole time!"

Michael shrugs, trying to seem casual. "Guess so." His feigned nonchalance is ruined when he surges forward, knocking Jeremy backwards into the sofa with the force of his hug. "I'm so happy right now. Fuck."

"You lug, you could've knocked us off the couch!"

He sits up. "You're clumsier than I am. Jer..." He's biting his lip again, though out of apprehension this time. Jeremy takes his thumb, slowly pulls it free and soothes it with a touch.

"Yeah, Micah?" He gives him a big smile.

"Are you...bi? Pan? I mean, not that it matters, except it kind of does. What are we? What does this," he gestures between them. "Make us? And quit smiling at me, I can’t stop messing up my sentences when you look at me like that! I'm too gay for this.”

Jeremy snorts. Michael is a mess. He loves it. "I think I'm bi. It makes a lot of sense, looking back. But even if I'm not sure on what I _am_ right now, I know...what I want." The last part comes out quietly. "I want us to be together. Like, holding hands in the hall. Hopefully making out as much as possible. And being so cute we upstage Jake and Rich. That's important."

His laugh, when it comes, makes Jeremy's stomach feel light and fluttery. "I want that too. Will you stay tonight? Waking up to your voice has always been my favorite thing."

Jeremy flops his face into a throw cushion, hiding his face. He can feel it burning. He yells out a muffled, "That's so gay Michael oh my _god_! You're going to kill me."

He kisses the back of his neck. "It's me Jer, what did you think you'd get? I'm always this gay."


End file.
